Badass

Hello again.

It’s been awhile, about six months or so.

And what have I been doing in that time? you might ask (or might not, but I’m going to tell you anyway).

Well, nothing less than reinventing myself.

So about a year ago, the words were drying up. No stories coming out, just dry sand pouring out of me. I wrote religiously in my journal for a few months instead. Just to keep words coming. I felt I was at a strange impasse in my writing life, as if something was going to change, but I wasn’t sure how.

At the time, my husband (going through his own sort of midlife transition) had just discovered a book written by a life coach named Jen Sincero, called “You Are a Badass.” I know, hilarious, but stay with me here.

You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero

He was so excited and inspired by this book. He kept badgering me to read it. I said, “I will sometime, just not now.” I wasn’t ready to take life by the horns yet. I was waiting for something, though I didn’t know what.

In the meantime, my husband was walking 500 miles over the course of two months in the middle of a cold New England winter to bring awareness to volunteerism. He walked along the roads and highways of our area in single digit weather, holding homemade signs that said “Thank a Volunteer”, “If You Volunteer, You Are Awesome,” and many others I helped him make that winter.

Who was this guy freezing his buttocks off, waving signs at beeping cars whizzing by? This was so out of the ordinary for my husband, so unlike him, so…well, badass.

I was surprised, a little perplexed, a tad appalled, very impressed. I was proud of him.

Hey, want to be a badass, too! But how?

Not by walking around with signs. That’s his thing. Not with fiction. I felt barren there. And strangely uninterested. But I did want to write something. And be a badass at it. Hmm, maybe I should read that book, I thought.

And around the time I did pick it up, the answer came to me.

It was an email I’d seen years before, from American Writers & Artists, Inc., about learning how to be a copywriter. Back then, I deleted it, profoundly dismissive. I was all about the fiction then. I was a (sniff) “fiction writer”, with nose in the air.

AWAI

Fast forward ten years, with a few stories under my belt, a couple of (very small) successes, and crickets chirping in my bank account. This year I turned 48. I have no house, no savings, no retirement, I’m making minimum wage at a cash register, living from paycheck to paycheck, and beginning to suspect that that bestseller that was going to make me rich is not forthcoming.

I was suddenly extremely interested in copywriting.

If you don’t know, copywriting (not copyrighting) is writing sales copy for businesses. Sales letters, web copy, emails, social media ads, that sort of thing. The sort of thing I never thought I’d be interested in doing. Ever.

It’s funny how being in a financial suckhole piques your interest in areas where the money is. And you can make good money copywriting. You can make great money, if you know what you’re doing.

So I signed up for the course. And that’s what I’ve been doing these past six months: eating, sleeping, breathing copywriting. I’ve taken a few courses, actually. And read articles, and watched webinars, and studied copy, and even created a LinkedIn account.

And I’ve found that copywriting is really pretty fascinating. What makes people buy stuff? It seems an obvious question, but there’s more to it than you might think. There’s a whole psychology behind it, a process. A system. Who knew? I didn’t.

And believe it or not–it’s fun. I’m excited by writing again. And the “niche” I picked (the area or industry you want to specialize in) is alternative health, particularly herbs and supplements. Turns out, I’m a wannabe herbalist, as well. So I’ve also been studying herbs, signing up for online courses at Herbal Academy, learning about adaptogens and women’s herbs (particularly helpful for me right now), herbal remedies, etc. I love it.

Herbs, Natural, Pharmaceutical, Green, Ingredients

During this time, I also read “You Are a Badass,” by Jen Sincero (and two of her other books), and I’m not exaggerating when I say this book has changed my life. It’s changed my whole perspective on who I’ve been, who I want to become, my attitude about money, what I believe I can accomplish.

I found myself doing weird things like repeating affirmations to myself (“I have the power to manifest my dreams” or “I love money and money loves me”), and making a vision board of my dream home. Hokey stuff like that. But you know what? I don’t care. It’s given me hope–and the belief–that I can change my life. It’s even caused me to believe in a supportive Universe. For a change.

And besides, it’s a fun read. Jen Sincero is really funny, and personable, and she says f**k a lot. So I really recommend it.

And no, I don’t have my copywriting business up and running yet. I don’t have clients yet, and I don’t have money rolling in yet. But I will. You know why?

Because I’m a badass.

 

 

Why Everyone Should Read "You Are a Badass" by Jen Sincero | Her Campus

 

 

 

 

 

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List Lover

journal

Lately, my writing has gone inward. All I want to do right now is to write in my journal, to reconnect to and renew my commitment to the first kind of writing I ever did. And that’s what I’ve been doing the past few months, with all thoughts of fiction-writing (or essays or memoir or blogging) seemingly out the window. And that’s okay. But I have to say, I have missed blogging. Blogging is a kind of digital diary, and I don’t want to let it go completely.

In keeping with the personal journalling theme of my life right now, and since I’m such a lover of lists, I decided to try to post a top ten list once a week or so. The lists could be just about anything, but I’ll try to make it interesting. Feel free to list your own answers in the comments; this could be fun!

Here’s my first list:

List ten reasons you write (or draw or paint or play music, or whatever art form you pursue).

  1. I love stories (fictional or personal) and love to tell my own in writing.
  2. It makes me feel like I have a voice (I often feel like no one listens to me).
  3. I was the quiet kid (and adult, too).
  4. I’m better at writing than speaking.
  5. It’s my form of immortality.
  6. I can live vicariously through my characters.
  7. It’s the shy person’s alternative to acting.
  8. I have a compulsion to fill blank lines.
  9. Whole worlds live inside me.
  10. It’s a good excuse to sit in cafes and sip coffee.

Why do you do the thing you love?

 

Keep Going

bee on flower

Lately, I feel as if my writing has been a series of snippets here and there, projects started and abandoned, notes taken, a few lines added, dropped again. Scattered leaves blowing in the wind. Like an essay I’ve been mulling about my grandmother. Or a short story about a young man who occasionally goes invisible without warning, beyond his control. Or musings on a possible memoir, focusing on how books shaped my life. And there’s still that unfinished draft of the time-travel novel, waiting in the wings. I desperately want to write and finish all of these things, and yet when I pick any one of them up, I quickly lose interest, or become mentally constipated. What’s going on?

Maybe it’s the restlessness of spring after a long winter, preferring to be out in the warm sunshine rather than holed up with the work of organizing my muddled thoughts. Maybe it’s the deep crisis of confidence I’ve been experiencing lately, the source of which I can’t pinpoint–every word I write screams wrongness, or worse, futility. Maybe it’s the turmoil of pre-menopause: I’m transforming into some mid-life beast that terrifies me, the physical and emotional throes of which keep me from finishing anything. Maybe I’m just really enjoying writing book and movie reviews on my new blog. Maybe that’s simply what I’m supposed to be doing right now, until I can settle down and focus on other writing. But I know I’ll eventually want to do something else, to write my own stories again.

I’ve always tried to wrestle my writing routines into some sort of discipline, because that’s what writers need to do, right? And I do, for the most part–I make sure I sit down with the notebook or in front of the computer screen on a regular basis to write. But I tend to flit from project to project, like a bee gathering pollen, a little here, a little there, with the result of feeling like I never finish anything. It’s a bit depressing.

It’s not true, of course; I have many short stories and countless blog posts that prove otherwise. I also have a lot of unfinished stuff, and ideas floating around like spores. But I think that’s true of most writers. I’m sure there are many out there whose routines are such that they finish the project they’re working on–write, rewrite, edit, polish, seek beta readers, rewrite again, query, send out for publication– before they move onto another. All very orderly. I envy them. But for some, I’m sure, it’s a messier process. We’re creatives, after all; creativity can be messy.

I suppose the point of this post is to remind myself–and maybe some others–to keep going. Just keep writing, no matter where you are in the process (or in your life), no matter what your routine. Keep dipping your toe into that big well of creativity, and something will come to fruition. Or, to stay with my rather clumsy spring metaphor, keep pollinating and something will eventually bloom.

 

 

 

Writer Beware

warning sign

Okay, writer friends, this one’s for you.

I recently received an unsolicited email from a purported small press called Z Publishing, with an “invitation to submit” some of my stories. Apparently they’d come across my blog site and felt they were good enough to include in an “Emerging Writers” anthology. There was no fee for submitting, and after a “careful review” of all the submissions, they’d let me know if one of my stories made it into the anthology.

Sounds great, right? It’s a beginning writer’s (or unpublished writer’s) dream: just post some of your work on your blog, sit back, and wait for the offers of publication to roll in. No work involved! And what a great ego booster–handpicked out of all the thousands of bloggers and writers on the web. After a few minutes of feeling really special, suspicion crept in. Luckily, I wasn’t born yesterday. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.

I kept reading. Red flags began to appear. Don’t worry, they said, about 80% of submitted work makes it into the anthology. (Really? Huh.) By the way, there is no payment for writers who submit. (A-ha!) Unfortunately, they’re such a small press and still trying to grow, that they cannot compensate contributors yet. Oh, you can become an affiliate and advertise the anthology on your social media and get a certain percentage of sales…sales that probably are only going to be made by your small circle of family and friends, since the anthology will never see the light of day anywhere else.

So…you can’t pay me, I have to buy the anthology if I want a print copy (otherwise I get a PDF), and I have to market it for you, while you pocket the majority of any income. Hmmm…It’s all starting to become crystal clear to me.

But look what’s in it for you! they go on. The all-important “exposure” element. An invite to our private Facebook group. And we nominate our favorite writings for the Pushcart Prize! (Pushcart, huh?)

By now my ego has been totally deflated, and I’m dripping with sarcasm. And not a little anger. I googled Z Publishing and came across an article that just confirmed my suspicions: it’s one of the many new faces of writing scams under an old trick–vanity anthologies. I knew enough to be suspicious, but some new writers may not, and will fall for this scam, giving their work away for no reward.

Writer friends, I know you’re smarter than that, but just in case–please beware of vanity publishing. If you want to be published, work hard and submit to reputable publishing houses. Read the fine print. And NEVER give away your writing for others to profit off of. You’re better than that, and so am I.

New Venture

key-with-keyboard
Enter a caption

If you’re at all familiar with this blog, you’ll know that I LOVE books, movies, and television. Enjoying other people’s stories is a big part of my life, almost as much as, if not more than, my own writing. I’ve written quite a few book, film and TV reviews for this blog (you can find them under the appropriate categories to the right), and I love doing them.

The problem is, I’ve read in several different places that writing reviews does absolutely nothing for strengthening your writer platform. I get it: you may be drawing readers who also love books and film, but you’re not necessarily drawing in readers for your fiction. The proof is in the numbers: after nearly three years of fairly regular blogging, I’ve snagged a paltry 160 followers. I never dared hope for thousands, but I did hope to get a few more than that. I know it takes time and perseverance for a blog to grow, but I do think there’s room for improvement.

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately, and feel that perhaps the problem is that the blog is too broad–I dump everything in it. Reviews, personal stuff, essays on whatever, as well as my own fiction. I’ve already created another blog for my personal musings on my experiences raising a child with spina bifida (Beautiful Detour )–but I feel I probably need to focus further.

I’ve read various quotes from several different sources claiming that if you want to write, you someday have to stop reading other people’s stories (at least for a time) and write your own. It makes sense. Here’s the thing: I don’t think I can. I’m a bit obsessive about reading books and watching movies and TV. It’s a big part of who I am. I’ve often felt conflicted between the two and pulled in different directions. Am I a writer, or mostly a lover of writing? At this point in my life, with only so much time, I feel I need to choose, and be done with it. The truth is, I can’t.

So I finally come to the point of this post, which is that I’ve created yet another blog, called Page and Screen. In it, I will exclusively write book, film, and TV reviews to my heart’s content, simply because I love to do it. If you care to do so, and are at all interested in my opinions on other people’s stories, please click the link and follow it. If not, that’s okay, too.

Don’t worry, I’ll still write my own stories. I’m far less organized and have no clear plan concerning my fiction, but I can’t imagine giving it up completely. My Writing Journey will remain the home for my musings on the writing life, as well as the occasional personal essay, story or snippet, and other things (things I haven’t quite figured out yet) to increase my fiction writing platform.

So, three blogs? Call me crazy, but yes, I love it, and I’m so grateful for this unique way of exploring my interests and passions.

 

 

A Fun Form of Research

books and science

I’ve been spending the last few months working on the first draft of what is turning out to be a novel. It began as an idea for a short story based on a prompt I came across in Writer’s Digest magazine: Your character hears a knock on the door. When he/she answers it, the person who knocked says, “I’m from the future. I’m here to save your life.”

I loved that prompt, and thought I could do something with it. As I worked on the idea I had for the short story, I realized I wanted to know more about that person who knocked on the door. I wanted to know more about that future he was allegedly from. So I started digging, and wrote some more. And more, and more. Soon enough, it was clear I was writing a novel.

Not what I had planned, but okay. It turns out this particular future–without going into too many details right now–is heavily science-oriented, and science has solved a lot of the world’s problems. Awesome. But because of this, books are rare, and reading literature is not particularly encouraged. My character, named Benjamin, nevertheless discovers the joy of reading. Here’s a sampling of the books he reads in the story:

  • The Time Machine, by H.G. Wells. Since Benjamin is from “the future”, then a time machine must figure in the story somewhere. This book excites him when he reads it as a child.
  • Antigone, by Sophocles. Benjamin has a good friend named Ellen, who aspires to be an actress (which is considered another subversive activity, besides reading literature). She puts on one-woman plays for him, including this one, playing all the characters.
  • Murder on the Orient Express, by Agatha Christie. Benjamin is studying law enforcement (considered a second-rate occupation, far beneath the hard sciences–that, and the fact that there’s not much crime to begin with). He discovers a fondness for murder mysteries; though murder is a rare occasion in his world, it becomes horribly real for him later on.
  • 1984, by George Orwell. Benjamin reads this when he is unfairly persecuted simply for being different. He becomes marked and is always being watched. The book mirrors the tyranny that is beginning to bloom in his society.
  • Love in the Time of Cholera, by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. Neither Ben, nor my present day character, Brooke, has read this book, but it plays a small, though key, role in the story. And I like the title–there’s a love story in here somewhere, and there is a terrible illness that threatens the future.

I have to confess that either a) it’s been a long time since I’ve read some of these books, or b) I haven’t read some of them at all. If I’m going to mention any of these books in my story, I better have read them and be very familiar with them.

Reading books–what a totally painless form of research! Because I also have to look into sciencey-related things (NOT my strong point), including writing about time travel in a way that doesn’t make a physicist roll her eyes.

I’ve always been a bit lazy about research (or at least whiny about it), but this I can do.

If you’re a writer, do you like research as part of your writing process? Or does it fill you with dread? Any subjects you like better than others? Drop me a line and we’ll talk about it!

First Lines

blank book with letters

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.

All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.

Many years later, as he faced the firing squad, Colonel Aureliano Buendia was to remember that distant afternoon when his father took him to discover ice.

These are, of course, first lines of famous novels (Pride and Prejudice, Anna Karenina, and One Hundred Years of Solitude, in case you’re wondering).

If you’re a writer, you inevitably come across writing advice that tells you to pay particular attention to the first line of your story. Whether it’s a novel or flash fiction, its purpose is to not only draw your readers in, but also to set the tone and maybe hint at what is to come.

Perusing some of the books on my shelf, I came across these perhaps less famous but serviceable gems:

  • The King stood in a pool of blue light, unmoored. (Station Eleven, by Emily St. John Mandel).
  • For more than two hundred years, the Owens women have been blamed for everything that has gone wrong in town. (Practical Magic, by Alice Hoffman).
  • I still remember the day when my father took me to the Cemetery of Forgotten Books for the first time. (Shadow of the Wind, by Carlos Ruiz Zafon).
  • They used to hang men at Four Turnings in the old days. (My Cousin Rachel, by Daphne du Maurier).

Coming up with a great first line is an art in itself, and I’m not sure I’ve quite got it down. It takes practice. Personally, I think short story first lines should be punchy and to the point, while novels can ease into a scene–the whole scene taking the place of the first line to grab a reader and lure them in.

Here’s a sampling of some of my short story first lines:

  • Alice left her body for the first time the day George nearly killed her. The Memory of Oranges
  • I went to the river where my husband died, looking for absolution.  Clean
  • Oliver loved the monsters. The Hungry
  • Rose knew they’d be coming soon to implant her. Plugged In

Would you want to continue reading these stories? My hope is yes. Usually with a first draft, I don’t worry about it too much; just begin. Then go back and try to sculpt it into something that says, you just gotta read this. 

What are some of your favorite first lines? Any great ones of your own? Drop me a line and we’ll talk about it!