I’ll Never Do This

Don't walk

I’m a lover of lists. Whether it’s making a to-do list or grocery list for home, or listing my favorite (fill in the blank) for the blog, there’s something about numbering lines on a piece of paper and filling it that makes me weirdly happy. I feel organized and/or insightful, somehow in control of my world.

While poking around in a book of writing prompts (still not feeling it and needed some help), I came across this one: List 25 Things You Will Never Do. This one appealed to me; it turned the usual list-making idea onto its head. Not what you will do or want to do, but what you’ll never do. It examines the underbelly, the negative space in your life.

Well, here’s a least 10 Things I’ll Never Do:

  1. Jump out of an airplane.
  2. Eat Kale.
  3. Read Ulysses.
  4. Be able to keep a plant alive.
  5. Be fashionable.
  6. Give up chocolate.
  7. Learn to drive stick shift.
  8. Get an iPhone.
  9. Stop biting my fingernails.
  10. Stop writing.

It feels good to at least know what I won’t do.

What will you never do?

 

 

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Let the Whole Thundering World Come Home

Page and Screen

thundering world

Readers of my other blog, My Writing Journey, know that I’ve been a longtime fan of Natalie Goldberg, ever since I discovered her first writing book Writing Down the Bones way back in my twenties, and I tentatively thought that maybe, possibly, you know, I could be a writer. She gave me the courage to put words down on paper, to own my mind and my truth, and to keep writing, no matter what.

I’ve followed Natalie over the years through many writing books and memoirs, and though I don’t always follow her prescription of writing in the notebook everyday, I often go back to it when I’m feeling stuck or lost. It’s a baseline, a foundation that holds me up when I’m feeling like I made the biggest mistake of my life by pursuing this course.

In her books, I not only learned about writing and the writing…

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Keep Going

bee on flower

Lately, I feel as if my writing has been a series of snippets here and there, projects started and abandoned, notes taken, a few lines added, dropped again. Scattered leaves blowing in the wind. Like an essay I’ve been mulling about my grandmother. Or a short story about a young man who occasionally goes invisible without warning, beyond his control. Or musings on a possible memoir, focusing on how books shaped my life. And there’s still that unfinished draft of the time-travel novel, waiting in the wings. I desperately want to write and finish all of these things, and yet when I pick any one of them up, I quickly lose interest, or become mentally constipated. What’s going on?

Maybe it’s the restlessness of spring after a long winter, preferring to be out in the warm sunshine rather than holed up with the work of organizing my muddled thoughts. Maybe it’s the deep crisis of confidence I’ve been experiencing lately, the source of which I can’t pinpoint–every word I write screams wrongness, or worse, futility. Maybe it’s the turmoil of pre-menopause: I’m transforming into some mid-life beast that terrifies me, the physical and emotional throes of which keep me from finishing anything. Maybe I’m just really enjoying writing book and movie reviews on my new blog. Maybe that’s simply what I’m supposed to be doing right now, until I can settle down and focus on other writing. But I know I’ll eventually want to do something else, to write my own stories again.

I’ve always tried to wrestle my writing routines into some sort of discipline, because that’s what writers need to do, right? And I do, for the most part–I make sure I sit down with the notebook or in front of the computer screen on a regular basis to write. But I tend to flit from project to project, like a bee gathering pollen, a little here, a little there, with the result of feeling like I never finish anything. It’s a bit depressing.

It’s not true, of course; I have many short stories and countless blog posts that prove otherwise. I also have a lot of unfinished stuff, and ideas floating around like spores. But I think that’s true of most writers. I’m sure there are many out there whose routines are such that they finish the project they’re working on–write, rewrite, edit, polish, seek beta readers, rewrite again, query, send out for publication– before they move onto another. All very orderly. I envy them. But for some, I’m sure, it’s a messier process. We’re creatives, after all; creativity can be messy.

I suppose the point of this post is to remind myself–and maybe some others–to keep going. Just keep writing, no matter where you are in the process (or in your life), no matter what your routine. Keep dipping your toe into that big well of creativity, and something will come to fruition. Or, to stay with my rather clumsy spring metaphor, keep pollinating and something will eventually bloom.

 

 

 

Writer Beware

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Okay, writer friends, this one’s for you.

I recently received an unsolicited email from a purported small press called Z Publishing, with an “invitation to submit” some of my stories. Apparently they’d come across my blog site and felt they were good enough to include in an “Emerging Writers” anthology. There was no fee for submitting, and after a “careful review” of all the submissions, they’d let me know if one of my stories made it into the anthology.

Sounds great, right? It’s a beginning writer’s (or unpublished writer’s) dream: just post some of your work on your blog, sit back, and wait for the offers of publication to roll in. No work involved! And what a great ego booster–handpicked out of all the thousands of bloggers and writers on the web. After a few minutes of feeling really special, suspicion crept in. Luckily, I wasn’t born yesterday. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.

I kept reading. Red flags began to appear. Don’t worry, they said, about 80% of submitted work makes it into the anthology. (Really? Huh.) By the way, there is no payment for writers who submit. (A-ha!) Unfortunately, they’re such a small press and still trying to grow, that they cannot compensate contributors yet. Oh, you can become an affiliate and advertise the anthology on your social media and get a certain percentage of sales…sales that probably are only going to be made by your small circle of family and friends, since the anthology will never see the light of day anywhere else.

So…you can’t pay me, I have to buy the anthology if I want a print copy (otherwise I get a PDF), and I have to market it for you, while you pocket the majority of any income. Hmmm…It’s all starting to become crystal clear to me.

But look what’s in it for you! they go on. The all-important “exposure” element. An invite to our private Facebook group. And we nominate our favorite writings for the Pushcart Prize! (Pushcart, huh?)

By now my ego has been totally deflated, and I’m dripping with sarcasm. And not a little anger. I googled Z Publishing and came across an article that just confirmed my suspicions: it’s one of the many new faces of writing scams under an old trick–vanity anthologies. I knew enough to be suspicious, but some new writers may not, and will fall for this scam, giving their work away for no reward.

Writer friends, I know you’re smarter than that, but just in case–please beware of vanity publishing. If you want to be published, work hard and submit to reputable publishing houses. Read the fine print. And NEVER give away your writing for others to profit off of. You’re better than that, and so am I.

New Venture

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If you’re at all familiar with this blog, you’ll know that I LOVE books, movies, and television. Enjoying other people’s stories is a big part of my life, almost as much as, if not more than, my own writing. I’ve written quite a few book, film and TV reviews for this blog (you can find them under the appropriate categories to the right), and I love doing them.

The problem is, I’ve read in several different places that writing reviews does absolutely nothing for strengthening your writer platform. I get it: you may be drawing readers who also love books and film, but you’re not necessarily drawing in readers for your fiction. The proof is in the numbers: after nearly three years of fairly regular blogging, I’ve snagged a paltry 160 followers. I never dared hope for thousands, but I did hope to get a few more than that. I know it takes time and perseverance for a blog to grow, but I do think there’s room for improvement.

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately, and feel that perhaps the problem is that the blog is too broad–I dump everything in it. Reviews, personal stuff, essays on whatever, as well as my own fiction. I’ve already created another blog for my personal musings on my experiences raising a child with spina bifida (Beautiful Detour )–but I feel I probably need to focus further.

I’ve read various quotes from several different sources claiming that if you want to write, you someday have to stop reading other people’s stories (at least for a time) and write your own. It makes sense. Here’s the thing: I don’t think I can. I’m a bit obsessive about reading books and watching movies and TV. It’s a big part of who I am. I’ve often felt conflicted between the two and pulled in different directions. Am I a writer, or mostly a lover of writing? At this point in my life, with only so much time, I feel I need to choose, and be done with it. The truth is, I can’t.

So I finally come to the point of this post, which is that I’ve created yet another blog, called Page and Screen. In it, I will exclusively write book, film, and TV reviews to my heart’s content, simply because I love to do it. If you care to do so, and are at all interested in my opinions on other people’s stories, please click the link and follow it. If not, that’s okay, too.

Don’t worry, I’ll still write my own stories. I’m far less organized and have no clear plan concerning my fiction, but I can’t imagine giving it up completely. My Writing Journey will remain the home for my musings on the writing life, as well as the occasional personal essay, story or snippet, and other things (things I haven’t quite figured out yet) to increase my fiction writing platform.

So, three blogs? Call me crazy, but yes, I love it, and I’m so grateful for this unique way of exploring my interests and passions.

 

 

The End of the World (For Adults)

The end of the world is popular, apparently, considering all the dystopian novels glutting the book world. I love a good doom and gloom story one in a while myself, but I prefer the adult versions rather than all the YA blockbusters out there (sorry, Hunger Games and Divergent fans, but it’s not for me). In no particular order, here are my favorites:

Station Eleven, by Emily St. John Mandel

StationElevenHCUS2

I loved this novel of the world decimated by a flu-like virus, leaving pockets of humanity behind to fend for themselves and try to stitch a meaningful life back together. Kirsten is a performer in an entertainment troupe called The Travelling Symphony (“Because survival is not enough”) that performs Shakespeare and plays classical music. They travel from town to town, trying to bring a bit of civilization back to the ragged bit of survivors. There is some trouble and a sense of menace from someone called The Prophet, but this is more than a good guys vs. villain story. It switches back and forth in time, beginning with Arthur Leander, an actor performing King Lear on what is to be the last day of the known world, and who suffers a heart attack on stage. The story spins out from this moment, and many of the characters are linked to Arthur and his legacy. This is what I’d call a “literary” dystopian novel, about the fleeting nature of fame, the meaning of art, and what human beings require not just to survive, but to live.

The Road, by Cormac McCarthy

the road

This Pulitzer prize-winning book is the darkest of this group, telling the story of a man who wanders a post-apocalyptic world with his young son, heading south on foot to a warmer place, and basically just trying to stay alive–searching for food and shelter, and trying to avoid cannibalistic marauders. No one knows what caused the catastrophe (and so neither do we), but the man is determined to survive and to protect his son, whom he tells they are “carrying the fire”. An amazing read, but be warned: it pulls you into a dark, dark place. The 2009 film starring Viggo Mortensen is excellent, capturing both the darkness and the spark of hope the man clings to for the future of mankind.

The Passage, by Justin Cronin

the passage book

This is the first book of a trilogy (The Twelve and City of Mirrors completes the trio), about our world devoured by another virus, this time man-made, an experiment gone terribly wrong. This virus causes some victims to become vampire-like creatures, with an insatiable desire for human blood. This book also toggles back and forth in time, from one hundred years after the catastrophe, to the time leading up to it, and centers around a special little girl named Amy who is somehow linked to the virus. A complex, absorbing story that was a page-turner for me. I’ve heard rumors of a movie, but haven’t seen any evidence yet.

The Stand, by Stephen King

the stand book

Arguably King’s most famous (and favorite among fans), The Stand remains the benchmark among end-of-the-world novels. Yet another virus has been unleashed upon the unsuspecting world, and its survivors have organized into two groups that will ultimately face each other in a showdown between good and evil: those who flock under the guidance of Mother Abigail, and those who follow the devilish Randall Flagg. King’s cast of characters are always vivid and relatable, his attention to detail prodigious, and his plots (and subplots) compelling. The 1994 TV series with Gary Sinise and Molly Ringwald is watchable and fairly true to the book, but do yourself a favor and just read it instead.

The Handmaid’s Tale, by Margaret Atwood

handmaid's tale book

The most political of this group, The Handmaid’s Tale tells the story of Offred, a woman in the near future who serves as a “handmaid” in a world where women have been subjugated to serve their patriarchal  masters. The U.S. government has been overthrown by a Christian theonomy (which posits that Biblical Law is applicable to Civil Law). Women’s rights have been denied, and their primary function is to bear offspring to their masters. Not strictly “end of the world” material (though it probably would be for me and most women I know), but it’s certainly dystopian. I’m chomping at the bit to watch the new Hulu series based on the book, which has received rave reviews.

Have you read these books? What’s your favorite dystopian novel? Drop me a line and we’ll talk about it!